Saying Goodbye

I started this blog in November of 2018 some months after my little sister had passed away. I had felt very strongly that God wanted me to do it. It was as if He was saying that I had a voice and He wanted me to finally use it. I had no idea what to write about or what I would learn about myself through these writings, but it has been truly astonishing.

Within these 4 years of writing I have learned:

• That writing is like therapy for the soul. I have cried many times writing these blog posts as so many of them have been personal and deep. But there have also been posts that made me smile and feel all warm inside because of how much I was growing.
• How to express my emotions and verbalize my thoughts. This may sound strange but it was not something that I was very good at previously. I never knew what to say to people in conversations and seldom ever truly knew how I felt on the inside about situations. But writing out my thouts and emotions helped me figure it all out!
• How to heal after the loss of my sister. Her passing was truly difficult for me and had I not had a forum to express my feelings and lessons along the way, I am not sure I would be where I am today.
• Documenting your life and memories is fun! I have so many great memories and stories that I can now come back to and read about. I have actually done this many times already and I just love the fact that I wrote these things down. I highly recommend it! Now I have these memories permanently documented and I can probably even share them with my kids one day.
• Writing is a skill that I never knew I had. God knew what He was doing when He told me to start this blog. He knew what He had placed inside of me and used this challenge of doing a blog to bring it out of me. Then He challenged me even more – TO WRITE A BOOK! That’s right y’all. I have written a book. Never in my dreams did I think I would be an author. But God knew, and I hope to have it released this month! The name of the book is of course – Change Your Perspective. 😊

Now I feel a change in the wind. God is leafing me to new things that He wants me to do which seems to mean the end of this chapter of my life.

I feel so very blessed and grateful for every single one of you who ever read a post or commented. Thank you so very much for your support. It has been an amazing journey. Maybe I will return again….who knows! But for now I say farewell and God bless!!

The light….

We are a light, shining in the midst of the darkness…..

In my last post I wrote about an experience I had in which my entire country had a blackout for several hours. That encounter really put darkness into perspective for me because it made me realize the importance of appreciating the dark seasons of our lives as well as the light. Check it out here.

Well, what I didn’t share was that during the night instead of complaining about the heat (no fan or a/c y’all!!) and sulking our way to bed, my husband and I sang songs of worship to God.

Yup! My husband pulled out his keyboard (which can run on batteries) and played some songs that he had been practicing for weeks now. And we had a powerful time of worship…..just us, under candlelight in our bedroom. It was amazing.

While we sang, I couldn’t help but think that this could have been how Paul and Silas felt while they were locked up in that jail cell. Surrounded by darkness and maybe the faint glimmer of a candlelight somewhere afar off. But the darkness of the situation and the prison cell could not hold back their praise! They worshipped God!!!!

I imagine it as if they sang to the top of their lungs with joy overflowing in their hearts the more the words poured out of them. They worshipped God in the darkness.

Then, the chains broke off them, and the prison doors swung open! God showed up in the midst of their trial…..because they chose to change their perspective about their situation. They became beacons of light in the midst of a jail cell filled with darkness and the jailer along with his family received salvation because of it!

SHINE YOUR LIGHT! Shine it bright for all to see. Shine it in the midst of the darkness of this world.

Strengthen your core

All my life I have had a svelte figure. I have known no other body structure…..that is…. until this pandemic hit!

Mid 2020 I was planning for my wedding and struggling with sudden weight gain due to months of inactivity. Looking back, it really wasn’t that big of a deal….I still looked great. But in my head, it was a very big deal.

Fast forward to 2022 and you guys….ya girl is still struggling. My main issue of course is my stomach area. It causes me so much anxiety and frustration! I have literally stopped wearing certain dresses because I no longer like how they fit me. I am not used to this new body!!

Which is the reason why, for this new year, I have been pushing to workout and eat healthier. I am so serious. It has not been easy but consistency is the key. I have not been seeing immediate results but that is not going to sway me! I will reach my end goal!!

Sounds alot like what is going on in my spiritual life right now too…….come to think of it. I have goals that I hope to reach. There are things that I am praying that God will do. And through it all I feel the nudge of the Holy Spirit that faith is what is needed.

Faith, essentially, will represent my core and it needs to be strengthened:

1. Through a determined mind to trust God despite what I see or hear.
2. Through consistent practice of believing what the Word of God says and not what my mind or someone else says.
3. Through my acts of humble service despite how I feel.

Having faith sure seems to be alot like working out! We don’t always feel like doing it, but we know that it is beneficial to our health (spiritually) and so we must try to exercise it (see what I did there 😁). Maybe all I really need for my physical struggle as well is to accept who God says that I am and not what my eyes are seeing. Yes, keeping my body healthy is important but so is my mental and spiritual health!

I am gonna try to work on it.

Onward to a year of accomplishing goals and growing in our faith! How has January been for you guys?!

More like Jesus – COVID-19 Lessons

Today is the 9th official day of quarantine here in Trinidad due to the Covid-19 pandemic. The sanctions have been steadily getting tighter with each new day – more businesses having to close, smaller groups, more cases….and more deaths.

But I am still optimistic. Because God is still in control.

One morning I woke up and began my Bible Study. And while reading my Bible, I was listening to a song that Natalie Grant shared on her Instagram. It is a song written by one of her twin daughters in a time where she had suffered a severe asthma attack. The song beautifully states that she will turn her Cares into Prayers and her Worries into Trusting.

😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

So beautiful and POWERFUL!!!

While listening and reading I suddenly felt this burst of revelation – that we ought to be more like Jesus.

Think about it!

Jesus was always about His Father’s business – everywhere that He went. While on His many journeys, He encountered various people and situations, but He never responded based on His emotions. Jesus never asked God ‘WHY did this have to happen?’. Nope – He always trusted God and faced each encounter as they came (whether it was the man with the legions, the woman with the issue of blood or the Centurion with the amazing faith). 😊

Although Jesus may not have fully expected these encounters (we always assume that He knew everything that was going to happen, but what if He didn’t?), Jesus knew how to handle each scenario – He trusted in God. He never complained that He was tired or hungry and ‘not in the mood to deal with people right now’. He even took ‘surprise’ situations in stride – responding with exemplary grace and love.

JESUS WAS AMAZING!

I want to be more like Jesus (need to really!). I want to have such faith, trust and reliance on my Heavenly Father that nothing shakes my walk and purpose in Him – not surprisingly disappointing circumstances, not people’s expectations and opinions, not the threat of war, famine or pandemic (looking at you Rona!), not thoughts of fear, worry or anxiety.

Nothing.

May this be the prayer of every human being in the world.

Be safe guys ❤

Pay attention to your expectations

Some Sundays ago, I had to lead worship at my church. This was not my first time leading, but this time I went into it with a different perspective. I keenly remember God telling me “Do not lower your expectations”. Our head Apostle was not in service that Sunday and for some reason I had automatically lowered my expectation of how the service would go. But God called me out on it!

Have you ever done that? Perhaps you looked around at the team you were assigned to at work/school and figured “Yup, this is gonna be a rough project”. But what if you being part of the team, means that it’s going to be successful?!

I have come to realize that, many times, I underestimate the power of God within me. Which makes no sense because God Almighty – the God who created us all – has placed His Spirit within us. So really is there anything that cannot work out for our good? Is there any battle we cannot face and win?!

God wanted me to trust Him, obey and let Him do the rest. And that is exactly what I did that day. I put my heart and soul into that time of worship and God showed up in a mighty, mighty way! I mean, people were getting deliverance and no one had touched them! It was mindblowing.

But first, it took me choosing not to lower my expectations. God told me “I can use ANYBODY”. And I am sharing that with you today. God can use anybody! Including you. And there is no limit to what He can use you to do either! So stop limiting Him, stop limiting yourself, and don’t lower your expectations. 😊❤

God bless!

The Navigator

Sometime last month, while on our vacation, my husband and I were driving through Tobago looking for a gas station. I had the map up on Google Maps and was directing my husband while he drove. I could clearly see that the destination was coming up and I verbally told him so, but I failed to let him know that the location would be on the left so that he could look out for it. So sure enough, he passed it straight!

I of course was upset because clearly you could have seen the gas station when it appeared but I had to admit that I had not directed him properly. So He wasn’t ready when he came to it.

Isn’t life like that sometimes? If we try to go through life with limited navigation, we miss God’s intended destinations for us on many occasions. God is much better at giving directions than I am! Therefore if we let HIM navigate us, the outcome would be much different and much better.

God is like Google Maps for us in this world. He knows every step we should take as well as every turn and every stop. He sees the entire journey for each of us but it is up to us to let Him direct us.

I for one, have been noticing that there are many areas of my life that I do not let God navigate. I guess I feel that I can handle them myself. But is that God’s plan for me? Am I doing it the way God wants me to do it? My finances for example. Whenever I need money, I know to pray to God as my Provider. But should I not also seek His guidance on how to spend the money that He provides? That part is my struggle.

I need to try a little harder to surrender every area of my life to Him. That way. I won’t miss my destination. 🙌😊 Hope this blesses and encourages you to do the same!

GOD HEARS

Sheldon and I have been officially married for 2 years!!!! Wowww what a feat. It has not been an easy road for us, but God has been there through it all. We are a stronger team and it shows. Thank you Lord for 2 years!!!

Sheldon and I really prayed and asked God to help us be able to go on a trip for our anniversary….and would you believe it? God did it! Just like that, Sheldon began to get calls for jobs…..it was amazing. We literally got all the money that we needed, the day before the flight was due to leave. Mind-blowing man.

It felt so good to be in the airport. I am fully sure now that both my husband and I LOVE to travel. God answered my prayers for a man like that! He is such a specific God – more people need to know that God indeed hears us. And He knows exactly what we need. I just love the way that God works.

Our trip was a relaxing one – the whole intention was so that both my husband and I could detach from all of our responsibilities (work and church) and just enjoy being together. It was such a blessing to spend time with my husband. He truly is my best friend and I enjoy his company :). Plus it was nice to go on one final trip with just the 2 of us. Now that we have a baby on the way, our future trips will like be with 3 soon enough! Ahhhhhhhhh! I literally am so very excited for that. I want our baby to see the world and love to travel just like their mama and papa. It’s a bold request, I know. But I also know that God hears us when we pray.

What a blessing it is to be a child of God! We have a Heavenly Father who hears us, He sees everything that we go through and divinely intervenes in our situations. He also corrects us and disciplines us when needed because He wants us to be good children, not spoilt ones. He loves us dearly – more than even our earthly fathers can. So much that He sent His son to die for our sins, so that we could have eternal life with Him. And so that we could have an abundant life on this earth.

This abundant life does not always mean that we will be filthy rich and have lots of worldly possessions on earth. It simply means that our lives are abundantly blessed in every way. We get to experience true peace, true joy, true love, and access to a Father who can supply our needs. And there is so much more!

Mannnnnn we truly are blessed.

I thank God for what He is doing in my life right now. It is far beyond what my own imagination could have conjured up, and trust me, I have a pretty wild imagination. But God saw it fit to save me – a girl who was lost, broken and tormented – and give her a new life. A beautiful, healed life. And He did it in His perfect time. I couldn’t see that this was what He had me waiting and trusting Him for – but I waited anyway and I am so glad I did.

Trust God friend. He sees. He knows. He hears.

Relax

Worry seems to be such an integral part of our lives. We worry about what will happen tomorrow. We worry about not having enough money. We worry about our children, our family, our friends. We worry about our jobs and it’s stability. Why do we worry so much?

Take this as your reminder to rest in God’s promises today. He promised to never leave you or forsake you. That means that the same God who created the universe and led the people of Israel to the Promised Land, is with you always. He will not fail you or turn His back on you.

I really wanted my husband and I to go on a trip for our 3 year wedding anniversary but we just couldn’t see how it could be possible. We didn’t have the money for it. So we prayed and asked God to please provide the money for us to go on a trip, and God heard us! Right now, we are relaxing in a nice hotel room in Tobago….all because we trusted Him to do what seemed impossible for us to do ourselves.

What is too hard for God to do? What can’t He: Provide? Protect? Heal? Absolutely nothing. So relax! Pray and trust His will to come to pass. He’s got this.

Love conquers all

Yesterday I attended the wedding of a very good friend of mine. I consider her to be my sister honestly because of all that we have been through together. She is a sister from another mother (and country!) and I was truly ecstatic to be witness to her being blessed with a godly husband. A man sent from God 😊❤.

Love is so very lovely to witness isn’t it?!!! And their passion for each other has me thinking deeply about the power of love. Love heals. Love is vulnerable. It covers a multitude of sins.

Love never fails! Love conquers all things.

Lord knows I have written alot about love in this blog! It has been the catalyst that God continues to use in my life to teach me new things and heal me in new areas. Love is powerful and many times we lose sight of this. I have become so busy, hustling and bustling trying to get so many things done that I have forgotten the value in slowing down and ensuring that my love tank is filled.

How is your love tank doing? When was the last time you checked make sure that you were truly ok and felt loved? Do you feel loved today?

Sigh, life can get us so very caught up in the everyday cycle that we forget to ensure that we are getting and reciprocating love from and to those around us. So……. today I took a moment and soaked up hugging and kissing my husband. I was mushy as ever and without a care in to world.

And it felt GOOD.

That wedding yesterday reminded me of the fact that my marriage is God ordained. God gave him to me as a gift! And likewise me to him. Therefore why should I be worried about things like his safety and money and clothing and food? God knows what He is doing!! I am therefore to also let myself be loved by God ❤. For He is the greatest love of all.

Don’t underestimate the power of love. God is love. Let yourself be loved today!